Why Do I Commit to Things?

I had a jewelry party last night. Now I have to say that it turned out very nice, saw some people I hadn't seen for a while, and I had a good time. But, for a week I was yelling at myself for making this commitment about a month ago to host this party. We were in San Antonio last week and had a wonderful, relaxing time, and my thoughts kepts interrupting my day with flashes of having to get ready for this party when I got home. Then when we got home, I was so tired. Travelling used to be fun, not it's a pain and hassle. - Just the actual getting there and getting back part. - The being in a different place I thoroughly enjoy. Anyway, I was so tired and again, those nagging thoughts kept popping into my head that I needed to clean my house, get a few groceries and cook a few things. Now, I love doing all of those things normally, but not when I'm on a deadline and have to get them done by a specified time. I like to do things when I want to do them. I don't like to be pressured. So now by yesterday morning I was really feeling pressured and thinking to myself, "Why am I having this dumb jewelry party? I just got back from Texas and Sunday is the baby shower for my daughter-in-law, I didn't need this right now."
So is this a lesson for me to not commit myself to things, or is it a lesson on loosening up a little bit and just take it as it comes and enjoy the ride? Probably both. At my age and place in life right now I have admittedly become a little spoiled in that I only want to do what I want and when I want and want to be able to change my mind if I feel like it. On the other hand, I had a very good time last night and actually talked and visited with friends. I've recently become a little bit of a recluse because of the hobbies I enjoy. This old party girl isn't so much into parties anymore, and am much happier being quiet and alone with my authentic self. So balance, and loosening up just a little, seems to be the lesson learned.
Who knew such a lesson could be learned by having a jewelry party?
BTW - got a real pretty necklace! Lia Sophia jewelry.

What Am I About?

I have so many things and thoughts in my head I would like to share. As a fairly young, modern, grandmother, I feel I have some wit and wisdom that others may be interested in, or you probably have thoughts and ideas of your own to share. As a 51 year old female from the baby boom generation, there are so many women out there that can relate to me and me to them and our voice isn't one that's heard. Sure, there are the women celebrities whose voices we hear all the time, but I don't feel they are able to relate to the real world and real life. They are all treated and looked upon as experts in different areas such as being a mother, homemaking, organizing, decorating, fitness and exercise, etc. But when you have nannies, maids, professional decorators, gardeners, personal trainers, and excess money to do it all, how is this real life? We need to hear from real women, with real issues, and we have to figure out how to do on our own with probably limited resources to do it all with.
Having said all that, I would like to introduce myself. My name is Nina Knox and I live on a beautiful lake, Treasure Lake, in DuBois, a small town in Western Pennsylvania . You can read my profile to fill in the blanks. It's April 8, but winter feels like it's still here today. Some snow on the ground and very cold. I have a lot of gardening and outside work I'd like to get started on, but I don't go out in the cold.
Yesterday was my son's (Austin's) 28th birthday. I can't believe he's that old. I don't feel that much older than when he was born. I had a family dinner last night for him. My Mom and Dad; Austin and wife, Melissa, and his 2 sons, Logan and Landen; daughter-in-law, Diana; Bob and I. Austin's choice for dinner was homemade chicken pot pie, salad, biscuits and hot fudge and peanut butter sundaes. It turned out pretty good.
Bob's been getting some bad news about his mother who lives in Harrison, Ohio, outside of Cincinnati. Bob's sisters have been reporting back to him. Mother Millie has some spots on her pancreas and lungs and biopsies were performed yesterday. We're waiting on results and are worried.
I finished a knitted scarf that I was working on. It's a summer scarf that I wanted to make to go with a new skirt that I just got. May wear it for Easter.
And what about American Idol last night? I'm very addicted and love Adam. I think he's very sexy, even though I could be his mother and he's gay. He's still sexy. I think Lil or Scott will be leaving tonight.
*News Flash* - Sun just came out!! WOO HOO!! That feels better.
Gotta get some ironing done. Mostly Bob's shirts. It's hard to keep up with these. Oprah's on in 15 minutes, so that's a good time to iron.
Don't know what to have for dinner. It'll just be me and Bob. Diana (Dee), who lives with us right now, will be having dinner at her grandmother's tonight. So something light and simple sounds good. Maybe an omelette.