Mystery of Death, Miracle of Birth

We got back home from our quick weekend trip to Cincinnati yesterday around 3:30 in the afternoon.  We had pouring rain pretty much the whole way home, but we still made very good time.  We had my little Fergie with us, so we had to stop one time at a rest stop.  It sure saves a lot of time when you drive the approximately 360 miles without stopping for an hour and a half at Cracker Barrel.  My legs just get so restless.  I was able to knit for six straight hours, though.


We got into my brother's house on Friday evening around 6:00.  My sister in law had her card club get together so Chuck (my brother), my Bob and I ordered take out Chinese.  That seems to be our Friday night ritual as of late.  Chuck and Jill have such a beautiful home and a very comfortable guest room.

Picture of Chuck and Jill at Christmas

Saturday morning we drove to the other side of Cincinnati to spend the day with Bob's mother.  For those that aren't up to date, Mother Millie has pancreatic cancer and about a month ago she was given 3 to 6 months by her doctor.  We are going to try to make this trip to Cincinnati about once a month to be able to spend as much time with her as we can.  It's a very sad thing to watch and she is very sad and depressed.  She's losing her hair with the chemotherapy treatments and is in a lot of pain.  The pain seems to be under control right now with pain medication.  She says the once a week chemo sessions are very difficult and make her very sick.  We were told recently by Bob's sister that two more tumors have been discovered.  So here's my question:  Is chemotherapy worth it?  I have no experience with cancer and admittedly know nothing about effects and results of chemotherapy.  All I know is that anyone I've ever know with cancer seems to get really sick from the chemo. and I have never known anyone personally that has beat this thing.  I hear of cancer survivors, but are there survivors from pancreatic cancer?  I just have all these unanswerable questions about this disease.  Why do some people get it and others don't?  Why does it happen?  What causes it?  My MIL has always eaten well, exercised a lot and was usually very upbeat.  Now granted, she drank probably more than she should have and had some very rough times in her life, but does this cause cancer?  It's such a mystery to me.

We took her for groceries and we just sat in her living room and talked.  Then we took her to dinner at a very nice restaurant where her oldest daughter, Debbie, is a waitress.  Debbie was working that night so she waited on us.  We were also joined by Bob's brother, Debbie's husband, and a very good friend of ours, Mike.  Mike was the best man and one and only witness on our wedding day 30 years ago. 

Mother Millie and Mike

Millie was getting very tired during dinner, but she ate well and was glad to be with family and friends.  I overheard her say to Mike, "Please pray for a miracle for me".  It's so sad.  But she really did better than I expected of her that day and she looked so cute with her little black hat on.

We took her home so she could get to bed, then Bob and I went back to my brother's house for the night.  After a nice breakfast with Chuck and Jill at a cute little restaurant called "The Breakfast Club", we headed back home. 

Our Sunday evening ended on a fun and positive note.  My son and his family were waiting for us at our house.  We knew they were coming.  It was their 6th anniversay yesterday and they drove the hour to our house to go out to dinner.  We had kept in touch and told them to bring the boys to us as we would be home by 4:00.  So we had a nice visit with Austin, Melissa and the boys, then the boys stayed with us while their mom and dad went to dinner. 

Austin and Melissa in front of my Valentine tree.

Melissa had her first sonogram today and we were hoping to maybe find out if we have a boy or girl on the way.  It's still a little too early, though, so we don't know yet.  The sonogram did show that the baby is healthy and growing well.  That's all that matters.

I continue to be amazed at the miracle of birth and the mystery of death up close and personal.

Enjoy the Good, Deal With the Bad - That's Life

I wish I had the time to write slower, with more thought and insight and wisdom, but I don't have that time.  Events seem to be happening faster than I can write about them, so I'm summarizing in order not to miss anything.
My DIL, Dee, and granddaughter, Riley, are in Pennsylvania from Spokane for two weeks and part of that time they have been in Pittsburgh with Dee's family so we only see her every few days.  I'll take it.  They were just here for about three hours and I made lunch for Dee and her mother, Lori.
Lori and I have known each other for about 30 years, even before our children were born.  Lori's parents and my grandparents are members of the same church and they have known each other's families just about their whole lives.  So now to have Lori's daughter and my son married with this little beautiful baby girl that is our mutual granddaughter is so unbelievable when we think about it.

Me and Baby Riley

Grammy Nina and Grampy Bob

Yesterday my mom and I went to the other kids' new house in Indiana, PA, to help my other DIL with the continual cleaning and decorating.  I certainly don't get as much accomplished when I go there as I would like to.  The boys are now in their new pre-school, so it's a little easier to get things done while they're in school.  We made a trip to Lowe's, which happens to be right across the street from their house, and shopped for curtain rods and a few curtains.  I got one curtain rod and curtain up in the downstairs bathroom.  There are approximately 20 more windows to go.  Mom helped clear all of the remaining boxes out of the living room and Melissa worked on cleaning the boys' toy room.  There is still a lot to do.  I'll try to get down there one day next week again.

On Monday, I went with Mom and Dad to the funeral home to make funeral arrangments for Grandma.  She's still with us, but Mom and Dad are going to Florida for two weeks in February and I didn't want to be faced with any of these decisions on my own and I wouldn't want them to have to rush back from their trip to be faced with this difficult job at a difficult time.  To write an obituary, choose a casket, clothes, pictures, etc. is not a pleasant thing to do at all, but it is easier to do before a death rather than the day of or the day after.  Grandma is 93 years old and weighs 59 pounds and we just do not know how she is staying alive.  It's still not her time.

Last weekend I finally got ALL my Christmas decorations put away.  All in the appropriate box and plastic container and in the closet under the stairs.  There are only a couple of things still left outside because they are either buried under snow or it's just been way too cold for me to want to go out and take it down.   I always leave the tree up in the tea room and I have it re-decorated for Valentine's Day.  The lace ornaments are left on, the Christmas balls come off and hearts go on, velvet bows come off and roses go on, and Christmas ribbon is replaced with ribbon with hearts.

 

I still plug those white lights in every night.

Oh, and here is my newest tea set addition for my tea room.

This was a Christmas gift from my son, Austin, and DIL, Melissa.  They found this black rose tea set in a little shop in Germany during their visit there in November.

Now tomorrow Bob and I are leaving for Cincinnati again for the weekend.  We want to visit his mother who is very ill with pancreatic cancer.  We will probably be making this 6 1/2 hour one way trip every month or so until ---.  Another sad event slowly occuring for us. 

When we get back home around 6:00 on Sunday evening, our son, both DIL's and all three grandchildren will meet us here at home to visit each other.  Then Bob and I will babysit the three little ones while the three older ones go out to dinner for Austin and Melissa's 6th anniversary. 

My wish for this beginning of this new year is to actually be able to hibernate for 3 to 4 days.  As much as I am thrilled to have my grandchildren around me and to be needed and wanted by my children, DIL's, and husband, I would love to have just a few days all to myself.  No visits, no interuptions, no place to have to go.  Just 3 or 4 days, that's all.  I don't really see this happening in the near future, though.  How about one day?  I would settle for one day!  Oh well, I'm not complaining, just tired.   

Busy and Growing Family

Oh my, it's been a busy week.  This was my first day in a week to spend alone in my own house and get some cleaning done here.  It's Friday, 5:00 p.m., and I'm finally sitting down with a glass of wine and catching up on my writing.  My Bob should be home shortly and is bringing home Chinese take-out.  This has become our new Friday night ritual.  We used to go out to dinner on Fridays, but we just don't feel like going out, especially in this weather.


The snow just keeps coming down.  Those schools that didn't close today ended up dismissing early.  I keep measuring the amount of snow by looking at how much is piled on my back deck railings and table. 

This was yesterday morning.  There's more now.

We need to get this shoveled off soon or it's going to get too heavy. 

                    Mom and Dad's house

My dad shoveling.  I know he's smiling, but he's not really having fun.

It's also very cold outside.  It was 8 degrees at 9:00 this morning and it's 16 degrees at 5 pm.  It's beautiful if you're lucky enough to be inside a warm house. 

Last weekend I wasn't so in love with this weather.  We moved Austin and family about 50 miles away, but with the back roads and the bad weather it takes about an hour and a half to get there.  Bob and Austin loaded the U-Haul themselves and I don't know how they did it.  I helped on the other end and spent the night with them Saturday night so I could continue unpacking and cleaning on Sunday.  It was so late, dark, cold and snowy that the U-Haul didn't get un-loaded until Sunday morning.  What a job!!  Bob and I came home Sunday and Bob said he felt like he just ran a marathon and I said I felt like I was hit by a truck.  We made a promise to each other that our furniture moving days are over.  The boys can find friends or hire professionals.  They have too much stuff now and we're getting too old.  We can do it, but the recovery time has increased greatly.

On Wednesday I went back down to the kids' new house with a car load of left behind items and continued the unpacking and cleaning.  The house is nice with a lot of potential, but it was really left dirty by the previous tenants.  I'm tired of cleaning but I can't make myself stop when there is still more to do.  I came back home Wednesday night and will not allow myself to go back down until maybe next Wednesday.  As long as Melissa is still asking for my help I will continue cleaning, fixing and decorating.  With her being pregnant I don't want her to lift too much or move furniture.

After I got home on Wednesday, exhausted and sore and getting into a hot bath, my #2 son, Brandon, called from Spokane.  It was 10:30 at night and I was surprised that he called that late, but he was telling me about their move into their house on Monday (see, if we're not there they find a way) and that they have a new mattress and new washer and dryer ordered and to be delivered when Diana returns from her visit here.  Diana arrived at her parents in Pittsburgh last night and she and Baby Riley will be stopping by my house tomorrow.  So I'm thinking to myself, why is he calling me so late and telling me this.  But I'm glad he called me so I'm asking questions about the house, mattress and washer and dryer.  Then he says, "and we also have another baby coming in August".  Oh My!!  Baby Riley is only 7 months old.  I am thrilled, though.  Brandon said that is why they called me first, because they knew I would be excited.  They were surprised but happy with the news themselves.  So now I have two new grandbabies arriving this summer.  That will make five grandchildren in six years for us.  I can hardly believe it. 

I now have more baby quilts to sew and baby sweaters, hats and booties to knit.  I just don't know how I can keep up!  I can't sew and knit fast enough!  I think we may be done with new babies after these next two, but I said that seven months ago!

Moving Into the New Year

This is going to be a hectic day.  This is moving day for Austin and his family.  They are only moving about an hour and 15 minutes away, but it's very cold out and a lot of snow.

Bob shoveling yesterday - there's a lot more this morning

 Austin is picking My Bob up at 8:30, in about an hour and a half, to go pick up the U-Haul.  The boys spent the night here last night so that Austin and Melissa  could get more packing done.  I'm going to gather up my cleaning supplies, some food for a few meals, a little bag for myself in case I decide to spend the night at the new house, then the boys and I will pick up Austin's brother-in-law that lives with them and we'll head off to the new house. 
The reason for the move is for Austin to be closer to his recruiting office.  It's a good move, but a hard one.  Austin is having to give up the house he's in now, which was his great-grandparent's home for 50 years.  It holds a lot of memories and was so convenient to us.  But these changes were in the best interest of their family, so life goes on.  This new house is not a "new" house.  Just new to them.  It's from around the 1960's and is a five bedroom, 3 bath with a unique layout.

 They'll just be renting it, so there are many things I would do to fix it up, but they won't want to do as a rental.  So I'll help clean it real good and offer my decorating advice.  Sometimes it's hard to draw the line between trying to be helpful and butting in.  I'll do my best to walk that tightrope.  It can be hard for me to not go overboard with the cleaning and the decorating because I enjoy doing it.  Why is it that I see dirt and problems where no one else does?  Just drives me crazy.  Anyway, so far they are asking for my help so I'll take advantage of the opportunity. 
The boys are still asleep, and as soon as they get up, which I expect to be any minute now, the "fun" will begin.  I sure wish I had slept better, but too much going on in my head.
Then last night my other son from Spokane called to say that they just got word that they got a three bedroom, 2 bath house that they had been on a waiting list for.  They are packing up their tiny apartment right now and moving on Monday.  This is a house on base (Air Force).  These on base houses are very nice.  They looked at houses off base to rent and there is nothing nice.  And they wouldn't be able to buy a home in Spokane that would be even close to being as nice as the base housing.  As soon as they get moved in, Brandon starts his six months of Survival Training and Diana will be coming home for a two week visit.  I wish I could go back with her and help clean and decorate their new home! That just won't be possible right now.  If they were closer I would certainly be there. 
I am hoping that I can get one whole day to myself pretty soon.  I think I'm going to be very tired after this weekend.
We did have our New Year's Dinner yesterday.

Table setting for New Year's dinner

 I cooked our traditional pork roast, sauerkraut, mashed potatoes, applesauce, green beans with almonds, and chocolate peanut butter pie.  There were nine of us here. It was very good, if I do say so myself.  Austin and Melissa ate and then left shortly after to continue their packing.
Ohh - there they are!  They're up!!  Time to get this party started!!!

Christmas is Over, Winter is Here

Now four days after Christmas and the clean up begins.  We (I) put all this time in preparing, decorating, shopping and then in one quick day it's over.  It's worth it though.  I actually love all the pre-Christmas day goings ons more than the day itself.  And isn't it funny how once Christmas day is over we (I) want to get rid of all signs of it.  I don't want to get rid of the feelings, just change the look.  Now I want everything to be clean and re-arranged.  I want the New Year feeling now of clean, starting over, fresh, renewal and good things to come.  I would normally take this week off and start the clean up on January 2.  This year I had to move the process up a week.  My oldest son and family found a good house right near his recruiting office so they are moving this weekend.  I am helping my DIL clean the new house and start moving some little things tomorrow and then on Saturday we get the U-Haul and My Bob and son will load it up.  They are only moving an hour away so then they can take their time in getting the old house cleaned up and rent it out for now.  They may decide to sell it later on.  Of course My Bob and I will be on hand to help.  For the last eight years, between college and now the military, we probably have  moved one or both of my sons once a year.  We're pretty good at it now.


Our Christmas was a good one.  Christmas Eve was early church service, a wonderful lasagna dinner prepared by my DIL, opening a few presents at son and DIL's house with two very excited grandsons, then My Bob and I back home early and just relaxing with an egg nog martini. 

Logan and Landen - they just couldn't wait to get these off, put on their new Christmas Eve jammies and open a couple of gifts.  They looked real handsome in their suits for about an hour.

Mmm!  This was delicious!  Tiny bit of alcohol, mostly egg nog and lots of cinnamon and chocolate shavings

Christmas morning was nice and quiet and enjoyable with just Bob and I until about 2:00.  I have Christmas dinner here and this year it was with Mom and Dad, son #1 Austin and his family and DIL's brother.  Mom, Dad and Austin made a trip to the Nursing Home to visit Grandma and Grandpa first and that was the sad part of the day.  Grandma now weighs 59 pounds and is almost vegetative.  I had visited two days earlier. We are now hoping for God to take her soon.  This is no way to live.  We can't even believe it's possible for her to be alive.  The time must still not be right.

My dinner was my traditional ham and scalloped potatoes and then the opening of presents.

My one day a year place setting.

I have to explain this picture a little.  Logan and Landen get so many (too many) toys from their parents and other family members, so I am a little more practical and get them clothes and things that they need.  They aren't always thrilled upon opening my presents.  The boys needed new snow pants, hats, gloves and snow boots.  I made Logan try his on and you can see how thrilled he was.  We were laughing so hard we were crying.  He reminded us of Ralphy from The Christmas Story having to try on the pink bunny suit.  But just wait until they can go out sled riding and then they'll be happy they have all this.

The Day was very nice with lots of laughs, just the right amount of presents (at my house anyway), and a nice prayer of grace and thankfulness at dinner given by Mom.

Then yesterday and today so far has brought winter to us in a big way.  I'm loving it right now.  The small problem is that we will probably have snow on the ground until April.  I love it until February, then I'm ready for a change.  Then it's a good time for a vacation to someplace warm if possible.

 

This is what we woke up to looking out the front door two mornings ago.  My Bob has to shovel a path for the dogs or they won't go out.

Then overnight last night we had quite a bit more snow and this was looking out the back door this morning.

As you can tell, I don't go out, I just enjoy the view.  I bet the boys are enjoying their presents from me today!

Tonight we're supposed to go to an Open House party at my girlfriend's new house.  And Thursday night  we're supposed to go to a New Year's Eve party at another good friend's house.  Honestly we don't feel like going to either, but because they are both good friends we will probably go.  I hate to leave the house.  Isn't that terrible?  The good news is it's because I'm very happy and content here.